I Will Go Before

Most of my life feels like a fog. Depression clouds clarity, dampens joy and muffles enthusiasm.

But sometimes God breaks through and reminds me how He is more powerful than my struggles.

This weekend I heard a beautiful song by Justin Unger, “I Will Go Before”, and I have embedded it into my heart. It is a reminder that even when our circumstances are dark, God is the light that goes before us. When we feel alone, He will be the open door. He is our Lord, and He will go before us.

“And when you die inside, I will cause your heart to sing forevermore. I am the Risen Lord, and I will go before.”

I went through a phase many years ago where I doubted my faith in God. I wasn’t sure if He was really real, or if I even had the ability to believe in Him. My prayer at that time was this:

“God, if You are there, I want to know that You are real. Even if I know nothing else in life, I want to know that You are.”

I remember one day where even thinking cohesively was a challenge. I questioned my mind’s ability to function and I was confused to the point of feeling faint. My world literally seemed to be spinning around me…and yet, I knew that God was. I knew He was the sovereign God He claimed to be.

Years after that, I was still dealing with anxiety attacks at night and depression throughout the day. Life doesn’t seem worth living when you’re in the middle of that, it just doesn’t. But God still breaks through. He brings grace when we doubt, He brings joy into the chaos, and He holds on to you when you don’t think you can keep holding on to life.

He goes before us. We never take a step into the unknown, because God knows exactly where we are and where we’re going. With God, we are never alone, we are never forgotten, and we are never abandoned.

Take this to heart, and live boldly. God goes before us.

“Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from Him.
He alone is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
My salvation and my honor depend on God; He is my mighty rock, my refuge.
Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge.”
– Psalm 62:5-8