jess leigh hanna

My cat died last night. 😦

He was my favorite photo prop and the snuggliest furball ever. He survived high school and college and my wedding with me…I guess I never thought he could actually die.

And you know, it made me mad at God. I was mad because I was hurt and it made me cry and it just seemed like a very mean thing for Him to do.

After crying awhile, I came back to my senses and acknowledged that God wasn’t just trying to be mean. Animals are born and animals die, and our emotional attachment to them can’t change that. He lets us enjoy them on earth, and for that we should be grateful.

But then I got mad at how intensely we are capable of hurting. It just didn’t seem fair. Why does it hurt so much when someone, or something, we love is detached from us?

Honestly, I still don’t know. 😛

But I know that God is constant, and in abundance or lack, in joy or pain, in whatever the circumstance He is still faithful and is still in control.

The familiar refrain always comes into my head at this point:

You give and take away, You give and take away
[But] my heart will choose to say:
Blessed be Your name

So even though I’m thankful for the time I had with my cat, it still hurts.

And that’s okay.